Archive for the ‘self-love’ Category

Brave!

Friday, June 14th, 2013

This song is just GREAT! It makes me smile so big… I even well up with tears… yes! I wanna see you be brave!

“Brave”
(Sara Bareilles)

You can be amazing
You can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug
You can be the outcast
Or be the backlash of somebody’s lack of love
Or you can start speaking up
Nothing’s gonna hurt you the way that words do
And they settle ‘neath your skin
Kept on the inside and no sunlight
Sometimes a shadow wins
But I wonder what would happen if you

Say what you wanna say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave

With what you want to say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave

Everybody’s been there, everybody’s been stared down
By the enemy
Fallen for the fear and done some disappearing
Bow down to the mighty
Don’t run, stop holding your tongue
Maybe there’s a way out of the cage where you live
Maybe one of these days you can let the light in
Show me how big your brave is

Say what you wanna say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave

With what you want to say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave

Innocence, your history of silence
Won’t do you any good
Did you think it would?
Let your words be anything but empty
Why don’t you tell them the truth?

Say what you wanna say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave

With what you want to say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you
I just wanna see you

Thanks, Rosie!

Thursday, April 25th, 2013

rosie-thomas-456

I read an article in Spinner magazine written by Rosie Thomas and it brought me to tears. Here is a piece of it,

I felt small and insignificant and embarrassed. “I was so brave once,” I thought, and now I was so afraid. It’s hard to describe to someone what anxiety feels like: I felt like I was invisible and the world around me looked so normal and I just couldn’t find my place in it anymore. Nothing made me feel better — escaping my body would have been my only relief — so all I could do was endure it.

There are times in life when we can’t get around what we are going through, when there aren’t any side roads or backdoor exits or short cuts, and all we can do is get through it. I think of fishermen on a boat when the storm is coming — it’s too late to turn back, so all they can do is hope for the best, tie everything down and pray that they endure.

My anxiety was with me all day long. I would wake up with fear and panic in the early morning and it just never went away.

You can read the whole thing here.

I have felt this way.

I feel this way right now. It has been such a strange few years. I just sort of lost myself in this dark isolated place within my own mind. And if I had a nickel for every time I’ve thought, “I was so brave once”… it is almost as if it has become the motto to my self-berating for not being “so brave” right now. I think often we forget how much health can affect us and how, at the end of the day, we must find value in our intrinsic worth, which is not and cannot be tied up with anything we do or anything outside of just exactly who we are…

So, thank you Rosie for sharing this with us and for being so brave in doing so. And for coming back to all of us fans. You are enough, even if you don’t sing again. You’ve touched my life for so many years–I’ve felt so connected to your music, the lyrics. Your voice has soothed me in so many dark hours and celebrated with me in so many happy, sunny ones. Thank you. Really, thank you.

Beauty redefined

Monday, October 10th, 2011

A friend and I were having a discussion about beauty and how we define it… here is the gist of what I said…

We are all beautiful. It is in the looking. It is in the seeing. I suppose it is about which angle we choose to see. Isn’t it ironic how we so rarely choose to see ourself in a way that beauty can recognized or appreciated. We are perhaps not able to get the right perspective about ourselves… for good reason. It helps us continue to grow and polish ourselves… If we were to catch the exact angle where our own beauty shined brightest, would we become like Narcissus lost in that one reflection? That one view… Peering into the darkness only to see one part of ourselves.

You are right. We should focus on just being, whoever we are but even that is ethereal and we can but breathe in every moment and know that life is something of a mystery.

You are beautiful. We are all beautiful. Life is beautiful if only we can get the right angle, or open our eyes and that is so much more of a task for good reason as well. Like Narcissus or Veruca Salt from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. When surrounded with ONLY beauty one becomes something different, something ugly. Transforms to be unique. When those of us who see things in all their colors, darkness, light, and every shade in between… We create a palette that colors the world more real. And this is a new kind of beauty. Something many cannot see.

Its in the pregnant pause of a busy mind that often cannot think of that witty retort in time but just a moment too late. Its in the tears of self doubt. Its in the aggravation of the inconvenient. In the misstep. In the tummy pouch, ten pounds past perfect. In the split ends and the frayed mistakes. Its in the deep grooves lined on your face like battle wounds from life. It is in the stress-induced rash displayed upon your face to read… I am struggling. It is in the mispronounced author’s name.

So perhaps you don’t see it in yourself. And I do not in myself but that leaves us searching for and finding it in everything else. And isn’t that a more solid beauty?

I wonder where else we can see beauty outside the box. If beauty can be redefined, then I have hope…

Month of Growth (take 2)

Monday, March 7th, 2011

 

In October of 2010, some 5 months ago, I started to make the commitment to myself for a month—and failed. =/ Oops. Well, no reason to beat myself up over it. I will just begin again…on the day before International Women’s Day…

On my to-do-list, I expressed my desire to do a few things every day for 30 days in attempts to start some feel-good habits. I want to journal, to meditate and to take a photo every day for 30 days straight. I also want to take vitamins everyday as well. So I will throw that in. I will share with you my progress as I attempt this again.
(more…)

No More Regrets, Just Dreams

Friday, January 7th, 2011

I have spent far too much time in the past few years going over and over and over all the things I’ve done wrong. Combing through the skeletons in my closet and beating myself with them. I have scoured my innermost thoughts so harshly I am raw within. It is time to move forward. I see I am not perfect. I know I have hurt people unintentionally. I know I have made poor choices I am not proud of but now it is time to take a mental photograph and leave this guilt behind. I will add these memories, these experiences to a much larger, much greater sum total of memories and experiences and see myself just a little bit more colorful because of them. We are a collection of thoughts, moments, people, experiences. And I am learning to be ok with who I am.

So the theme for 2011… no more regrets, just dreams. This goes right along with my pledge to be a little bit nicer this year, to myself and others. My motto will be a quote from Sara Teasdale,

I make the most of all that comes and the least of all that goes.

Our deepest fear…

Friday, July 23rd, 2010

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. ~Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles,” 1992 (commonly misattributed to Nelson Mandela, 1994 inauguration speech)

It is exactly in this spot that I struggle along with my fellow travelers in the journey of ours. I want to learn to love myself like I so easily love others. I want to help others love themselves as easily as they love me, easier even. If I wish to find a genuine reflection of self-love in the looking glass each day I must find myself worthy of it. I must be something, some one I can look in the eye with respect, with gratitude, with kindness. There are two sides of this and I intend on working on both. It is a balancing act, self-love, but I have my tights on and I am ready to walk the walk…no matter how narrow or windy the road, no matter the obstacles before me. It will be an adventure and I am so ready for one!

I Am Mine by Brooke Waggoner
Beautiful Flower by Indie Arie
Beautiful by Christina Aguilera

Passion

Sunday, May 30th, 2010

Passion burns down every branch of exhaustion;
Passion’s the Supreme Elixir and renews all things;
No one can grow exhausted when passion is born!
Don’t sigh heavily, your brow bleak with boredom;
Look for passion, passion, passion, passion!

– Jalal-ud-Din Rumi

Passion is important in life. In relationships with others and yourself, passion keeps things moving, keeps things interesting and oft times is the catalyst for positive change. How can we revive passion when it feels like an act of futility? I am not referring to romantic passion, I am referring to having a passion about the choices, the ideas, the activities, the people in our lives. I am talking about enjoying our lives for whatever they are, wherever we are, whatever we are doing.

How can we remind ourselves that life is finite and every minute is worth enjoying, savoring? I know it sounds hokey but really, what are you doing right now (besides reading this post)? It is not what you do as much as why you do it… and how you do it. If it is watching TV or reading this post, are you enjoying yourself? Is this what you want to be doing? Are you actively engaged in the present moment no matter what it is you choose to be doing?

For example, we all must work to pay the bills or most of us anyways, right? Well, most people do not ‘love’ their work but they do it anyways. Why shouldn’t we love what we do? Why shouldn’t we be in the moment, present, active and enjoying what we are doing? We have all seen trashmen who are singing whilst doing some of the dirtiest work. We have also seen movie stars or famous singers wallowing in their misery, loathing every minute of the job that was once a favorite hobby. It is all in perception, really. It is not about being inspired to be passionate by some one or some thing else. It is not about finding everything rosy and wonderful. It is about being present and bringing passion to everything you do. It is about being the change you want to see in the world.

Does this mean everything is wonderful and you should pretend as such? No! Passion does not claim any one emotion, it does not disqualify or negate any either. If you are hurting, allow yourself to do so. Do not deny yourself the right to feel whatever you are feeling. Do not be harsh on yourself for your feelings. Respect them! Passionately love yourself! Give yourself the right to feel or experience whatever is real. This is what I need to practice.

Today, I will try to be passionate about whatever I choose to do. I will try to be forgiving with myself. I will try to respect my emotions and others without losing myself.

I would love feedback on this topic. How do you think we can reintroduce passion back into our day to day lives?

Love Thyself

Friday, May 21st, 2010
OH! The art of self-love

(Photo Source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/8171839@N05/3195436504/)

I struggle between loving myself and loving someone else. It seems this is a balancing act I have yet to perfect. I am too passionate, too involved, too concerned, too something and it never works out the way I had hoped, the way I meant it to work out.

I have to learn to love myself but how?

I have decided to embark on a journey to loving myself. It is not easy because when you are so focused on other people, you lose sight of yourself. Since I love to read, I will start there… I will read some feel-good books. Each moment I spend with myself will remind me why I need to take this journey NOW before my light goes out forever.